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Chuck Norris facts in Sins

Chuck Norris facts in Sins

Chuck Norris can defeat a fully upgraded starbase with a colony vessel.

Female Advent have hot voices to seduce Chuck Norris. It is not gonna work.

Last time Advent meteor-stormed Chuck Norris, he stroke back with a planet-storm.

Pirates don't accept bounty for Chuck Norris. They prefer commiting suicide.

Chuck Norris can stop a blast from a Novalith Cannon with his left hand.

Chuck Norris have never been minidumped.

A classic one : The vasari are running away from Chuck Norris

Chuck Norris have more karma than Annatar11

One day, Chuck Norris took a Missile Barrage from a Marza. He blinked.

In a gravity well, there is 1278 objects that Chuck Norris could use to annihilate your fleet, including the gravity well.

Chuck Norris can move his fleet whereever he wants, and it is often in your face.

Where Chuck Norris goes, mines steps aside.

 

1,020,844 views 375 replies
Reply #226 Top

Funny thread guys.  I didn't make it all the way through, some hopefully I'm not bringing something up twice. 

Chuck Norris facts are funny, but I prefer Dos Equis "Most interesting man in the world", sort of a less famous latin Chuck Norris. 

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QI58wj4b4g0

He once lost a SB, just to see it explode

His Cobalts have killed more then a lesser mans Marza

He is a Econ guy, not a rusher.  But he's also a rusher so don't get any ideas.

It is said he can reverse culture spread just by walking into the gravity well

His organ donor card lists his favorite smurf account

"There is a time and place for Jav spams.  The time is never, I think you can figure out the place on your own."

"I don't always play computer games, but when I do, I prefer Entrenchment"

And my favorite Chuck Norris quote from back when I was in the Army...

Chuck Norris doesn't need a bomb suit, bombs need a Chuck Norris suit. 

 

Reply #227 Top

Chuck Norris pays off the Pirates with YOUR credits.

Reply #228 Top

Chuck Norris is the reason TEC rebels show up on your planets from nowhere.

Koda0 (^)

Reply #229 Top

Every morning Chuck Norris goes online has has a daily serving of two hard-boiled Space-Eggs.

Reply #230 Top

Chuck Norris can phase jump across ICO games.

Reply #231 Top

The Novalith Cannon? Just a wormhole hooked up to the back of Chuck Norris' toilet. All you have to do is aim, and he'll do the rest.:P

Koda0 (^)

Reply #232 Top

Quoting koda0, reply 231
The Novalith Cannon? Just a wormhole hooked up to the back of Chuck Norris' toilet. All you have to do is aim, and he'll do the rest.:P

Koda0 (^)

Funny...I thought that was how the Kostura works... :\

There really isn't a good "confused" emote, here... X|

Anyway...

One day, our boy Chuck felt a need to get places faster.  A simple punch caused the anomaly that now drives Phase Stabilizers.

The Evacuator's Drain Planet is Norris w/a Vacuum Cleaner.

Reply #233 Top

Lol nice one.

Chuck Norris's enemy is the Vasari's enemy's enemy's enemy's enemy. They're all on the run and he's just toying them along before he UBERPWNS them

Reply #234 Top

The Vasari and Advent almost made it to earth once. Why did they stop? Around the clock broadcasts of Chuck's fist.

Chuck Norris isn't Annatar. If he was, he would have infinite karma.

 

Reply #235 Top

SD tried a 4th expansion focusing on just Chuck Norris's left pink toe, and for 23 seconds every game on ever computer in the world ran perfectly and all computers miraculously had Windows 7!  But after the 23 seconds was up, all of the software writers morphed into crying infants, every computer turned into a plastic mini Yoda, Windows 7 morphed into a program that repeatedly said (in binary) "would you like fries with that," and the single Chuck Norris skin cell sample that the devs had to work with had morphed into a god that 99.99% of the world population worshipped.  The other 0.009% became too busy making fries.

Reply #236 Top

oh, and I forgot to mention, 1/3 of the devs ended their lives by jumping off a bridge because they could not think of a cool enough name for chuck's expansion. 

 

wow . . .did you see that?  Merely typing "chuck" is making my walls shake!!!

Reply #237 Top

The Argonev starbase blows up because Chuck Norris farted

Reply #238 Top

Quoting Shirley, reply 230
Chuck Norris can phase jump across ICO games.

 

Better yet, he can phase jump between computer and console games.

 

Beware Vasari, when Chuck returns with flying fire burping plumbers!

Reply #239 Top

Remember the "defeat screen" when you lose? Those who are on the picture are NOT defeated. Those lucky bastards are alive bacause somebody must clean the sh*t that Chuck made.

Reply #240 Top

Chuck Norris uses actual state capitals for His Capital Ships

Reply #241 Top

Chuck Norris doesn't even use capital ships; he uses a scout and a colony ship to win.

Reply #242 Top

Quoting IrationalFear, reply 241
Chuck Norris doesn't even use capital ships; he uses a scout and a colony ship to win.

He doesn't even need that; Chuck Norris has won games with a Construction Frigate. Sometimes he even spams them. ;)

Reply #243 Top

Quoting Swordsalmon, reply 242



Quoting IrationalFear,
reply 241
Chuck Norris doesn't even use capital ships; he uses a scout and a colony ship to win.



He doesn't even need that; Chuck Norris has won games with a Construction Frigate. Sometimes he even spams them.

pfft, please, he uses a phased out Vasari Empire Lab...

Reply #244 Top

Wormholes are the result of Chuck Norris roundhouse kicking space itself.

Reply #245 Top

Master Sergeant Greers on SGU is Chuck Norris in disguise. Get out of order, get your bum kicked.

Reply #246 Top

Chuck Norris doesnt need scouts, he sees all and knows all.

Reply #247 Top

When chuck Norris attacks a capital ship shield mitigation drops to -100%

Reply #248 Top

The Kol is Chuck Norris Pinky finger, and the "Egg" is Chucks big right toe.

Reply #249 Top

And a Novalith/Kostura shot is his tongue.

Reply #250 Top

When a player attempts to put bounty on Chuck Norris' head, his planets immediately revolt and all ships turn hostile.
Who in the universe would willingly serve such a suicidal jerk??