Please Have Respect For My Virginity!

I'm waiting....you can wait...

from JoeUser Forums
Men!!! Can't live with them, yet you can't live without them.

Lets just say that some men are stupid. Yes, I said stupid. Some are even complete idiots. Now don't get me wrong. There are a lot of nice guys out there. But for the most part a lot of them are jerks, bastards, assholes, etc.

The main thing men don't give women is the simple thing called respect.

Last week, a guy friend that used to go to my school was talking to me through email. At first he was being really nice by basically saying hi and asking me what was going on. Then he started to ask me if I was alone. I told him that my brothers were at the house with me. Then he asked if I was alone in the room. I again replied no and that my brothers were with me. Then he all up and asked me if I would go and have sex with him! And he was being serious. Gah! I freaked out! He kept begging me after I had said no and wouldn't leave me alone about it. So finally after freaking out for 10min. I ended up blocking him. Then about ten minutes later a guy I know from a school close to mine was talking to me on msn and started telling me that I was really hot and that I was a total babe. Knowing my luck he was going to eventually get to the point where he was going to ask me for sex, but I blocked him too.

I hate it. Urgh! Some men do not have respect for a woman. All they want is a piece of ass and something to stick their dick into! And then after that, they're done with you and want nothing to do with you ever again. Why do men do that? You may say hormones and testostrone(sp?). But I don't think that's everything. I hate to use Alex and Brandon for examples, but you don't hear them going around saying they want to screw some chic. I think if a guy really wanted to he could control what he thinks about having sex with a girl.

I'd have to say that I don't know many guys that don't think about screwing a girl 99% of their day. Or at least don't respect the idea. For the most part I do know that Brandon, Alex, and probably Patrick don't think about having sex 99% of their day. I would say Shaun.....but....well you know. Sorry Shaun!!! I know that they are saving sex for marrige. And that's what I love about a guy who thinks that they should wait, and are actually going to wait. Sex should be something special that you share with the one that you love. You may love someone while dating, or think that you love them, but until you're married I believe that you can't fully love someone enough to have sex with them. I think all men should respect a woman's virginity, and respect the fact that they want to wait until marrige. That's exactly how I want the man that I marry to be. I want to know that he respects me and my virginity. And I know that Sarah probably won't agree with me on the whole premarital sex thingy, but it's her opinion and she has a right to it.

~carebear~
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18,737 views 21 replies
Reply #1 from JoeUser Forums Top
Funny article carebear and unfortunately a lot of what you wrote is kind of true. Unfortunately, sex is looked at as more of a sport than an act that consummates a marriage. So, assuming that your old highschool friends are pretty outgoing men, they will continue to play the odds game hoping that eventually a female will bite and they will be victorious. It really spawns from the competiteve nature of humans and the pressure that men have to be cool and lady magnets to fit-in. It is almost like the same pressure that a women feels when she is looking at fancy fashion magazines where paper thin models wear the sexiest clothing and are supposed to be the standard for every women. Most women I know look nothing like supermodels and I am kind of happy about that, but it stinks that women feel pressured into achieving the unatainable physique that supermodels possess. The same kind of pressure is there for men to get laid as many times as possible to prove that they are a real man. Another bad thing about this is that most men who feel they have to have every women are the one's with commitment issues and their inability to talk to others about their issues, because real men don't share their feelings (sense the sarcasm), results in them trying to screw every woman on the planet. I do feel that the trend is changing and will continue to change with each generation. I am, however, thankfull that me and a lot of my friends figured out that there is more to a relationship than just a good screw. Too bad it took most of us till after college to figure that one out.
Reply #2 from JoeUser Forums Top
You know the ironic thing is that if you are a slut...guys want you because they know they can probably get some from you...but if you are fairly pure or a virgin, guys still want you because they think it's hot that you're so pure. I don't know...is that supposed to be because they think it's a challenge or because it's like untouched property or something? I don't know. Guys feel free to answer. But yeah, either way, they just want ass.
Multiplicity - Control multiple PCs using one keyboard and mouse
Reply #3 from JoeUser Forums Top
Another bad thing about this is that most men who feel they have to have every women are the one's with commitment issues


Yeah, I don't want a guy that has commitment issues either. He has to be commited to me and only me. And I don't want sex in our relationship until we get married.

am, however, thankfull that me and a lot of my friends figured out that there is more to a relationship than just a good screw


Yeah, you should be thankful. lol. There are a lot of good things that can come from a relationship besides sex.


I don't know...is that supposed to be because they think it's a challenge or because it's like untouched property or something?


You know....I never really thought of it that way. Maybe they do.

~carebear~
Reply #4 from JoeUser Forums Top
Oh, I only think about sex 78% of the day....you see I'm not that bad. I do respect women though....more than anything in the world. That's why men who rape and beat women are the lowliest bastards in my eyes.....I can't express my anger at those kinds of people in mere words. I don't have a problem with premarital sex....but if a girl wants to wait, it doesn't bother me....whenever they're ready, is what I say( I mean that's why you have lubricants and hands... Heh, heh...). I will agree....even being a guy....that a lot of men are just uncaring, horny bastards....but I'm not one of them....( I may be horny occasionally, but that can't be avoided...lol)

Just to let you all know, I have an honor code.....I won't abuse women in anyway at all....I will not lay a hand against them, unless they threaten my life of course.

So, those are my thoughts,
~Zoo
Reply #5 from JoeUser Forums Top
78%. That's still a little high don't you think? lol. Yes, I know you respect women Shaun. And you're one of the few guys that actually do these days. Lets just say if a guy ever sexually harassed me in anyway.....well I don't think he'd have much of a dick left on him. That would learn 'em.

~carebear~
Reply #6 from JoeUser Forums Top
Lets just say if a guy ever sexually harassed me in anyway.....well I don't think he'd have much of a dick left on him


Pray that I don't find the cowardly bastard....he won't have much to live for if I catch him. No one should ever do that to any girl or woman. If you want to see rage at it's fullest give me a convicted sex offender in a room for about 10 minutes.

~Zoo
Reply #8 from JoeUser Forums Top
Hmm, you certainly had a bad experience that day. But fortunately, there's no need to generalize the behaviour of two guys to all guys on earth. Sentences that start with "Guys are ...", or "Girls are ...", are always in danger of ending up wrong because of oversimplification. There are certainly guys out there who treat you differently, so don't give up hope on us.

I think the important thing is to accept a "No". If you don't want to have sex, and tell that to a guy, and he still asks you, then he indeed doesn't respect you. Asking for sex alone doesn't show disrespect automatically in my opinion. It may also just show that the guy in question just has a different concept about what sex should be like.

I once had a girlfriend who objected to premarital sex due to religious beliefs. I would've prefered it otherwise. I'm not even a religious person. But no matter what the reasons were and whether I shared the reasoning behind it or not - a No is a No and has to be respected. And it was not even difficult for me to do that, because I loved her and wanted to make her happy, and pressing or persuading someone into having sex against their will is *not* going to make them happy, to say the least.

I also had a period in my life when I had a lot of sex with several different women. But having sex with them didn't mean that I suddenly lost my respect for them. I respected them before, and I respect them still, some of them are still friends of mine. I always made clear that I wouldn't push them into anything of course. I was sort of testing myself out at that time, the women in question did the same, and I actually made experiences that helped me in my sex life later on. As long as everyone involved is happy with that arrangement, I can't see anything wrong with it. The important thing is to respect a No.
Reply #9 from JoeUser Forums Top
Tsk. Tsk. In this day and age, virginity is a wicked word that should never be spoken!

I wonder what the hell would compel somebody to beg somebody they know for sex though, even over the Internet, unless that's all they ever wanted and felt a friendship was a waste of time.
Reply #10 from JoeUser Forums Top
If it makes you feel better, I respect your virginity and promise not to beg you for sex...hehe
Reply #11 from JoeUser Forums Top
It's okay Shaun. I think about sex, and i can openly admit it.
I think its cool to wait til marriage. All I can say (brandon said this sounded very guy esque) lots of guys want sex, what can you do?
I think that guys should respect you, and no means no. Guys are just...guys. I can't think of any better way to explain it.
Reply #12 from JoeUser Forums Top
Really good thread carebear! You're 100% right, if you want to wait your partner should respect your decision. And those other guys on the net that day were being jerks, good thing you bloked them.

You can be proud of yourself for having such high standards, YOU GO GIRL!!!
Reply #13 from JoeUser Forums Top
The main thing men don't give women is the simple thing called respect.

Respect is earned. Both through your actions and your choice of friends. Perhaps the problem isn't that these "men" are making these comments it's that you're friends with these types of boys.

If you're looking for something greater than an animal that wants to reproduce, you have to surround yourself with people that are greater than animals. To do so, you have to give those types of people a reason to be around you. More specifically you have to give them a reason to respect you.

Know that I respect that you have kept your high standards. It is something that is very important to me. But if you one day want to share that with someone that also holds those kinds of high standards then you have to earn that. If you do not, then you'll continue to have these types of "men" surrounding you and wanting sex from you so that they can "stick their dicks in" as you so eliquently put it.

Truely high standards is a very lonely place. There are very few people that will ever earn that kind of respect from you, and even fewer that will give you the chance to earn that kind of respect from them. Are you ready for that kind of loneliness?
Reply #14 from JoeUser Forums Top
If it makes you feel better, I respect your virginity and promise not to beg you for sex...hehe


Well.....thanks Texas.....I think....

Guys are just...guys. I can't think of any better way to explain it


I don't think there is a better way of putting it.

Island_gurl~ Thanks!

John Galt~ I think I can find enough guys out there that are different from the ones that want to have sex before marrige. It's actually not that hard to do. I already know of three of my guy friends that have that respect. And I'm not going to not be someone's friend just because they want sex. I'll accept anyone to be my friend, but when you go around bugging me to have sex with you, then that's when we have a problem. Trust me, I don't think I'm going to be lonely. And I can't just read the guys mind that wanted sex from me. I had no clue he'd ever ask me that. I've known the kid for a couple years now, and trust me I really wasn't expecting it.

~carebear~
Reply #15 from JoeUser Forums Top
It's not that men are thinking about sex all the time... it's that they don't respect their female counterparts enough to keep from badgering them constantly.

I myself have decided that I will not have sex until I am married.

Great article Ash! +insightful

Peace,

Beebes
Reply #16 from JoeUser Forums Top
Finally!! Another guy that actually agrees with me on the aspect of respect!

~carebear~
Reply #17 from JoeUser Forums Top
I myself have decided that I will not have sex until I am married.


You're a noble one, aren't you? I, however, will take it when I can get it Like I said....if I have to wait until marriage, that's not a problem.....but, if I get the chance....then there won't be much hesitation Seriously though, I can wait if the situation calls for it, I can respect a girl's decision to keep her virginity...there's not a problem with that, in fact I guess you'd say it's a good thing. I believe sex is mostly a girl's decision because she's the one that has to carry around a baby for 9 months....so, at least give her a choice about it. That's what I think, anyway.

Finally!! Another guy that actually agrees with me on the aspect of respect!


Hey, I just agreed with you like 13 posts ago...

~Zoo
Reply #18 from JoeUser Forums Top
Hey, I just agreed with you like 13 posts ago...


Yes, but you also said(maybe not up there, but i'm too lazy to scroll up there. lol.) that if you get the chance you'd have sex. So therefore you do not agree with me 100% there Shaun. I meant that we both think you should wait until you're married. Sex should be something that is special. I wouldn't really consider it as being so special if you had sex with a guy you weren't married to, then you dumped him or vice versa, and then you got married. It just would't be so special then. The special part should be with the one you marry, not some guy you're not gonna marry. Do you see what I mean Shaun? lol. I know you agree with me on the part about respect, but you really don't agree with me about saving it. Does that make sense?

I believe sex is mostly a girl's decision because she's the one that has to carry around a baby for 9 months....so, at least give her a choice about it


I think that it is not only up to the girl wether or not to have sex. I feel it should also be up to the guy too. I mean, if he doesn't want a baby in his life, don't you think he should have a choice too? I mean, even if you are married, you might not want to have sex as soon as you're married. So therefore it should be a decision made by the guy and the girl.

~carebear~
Reply #19 from JoeUser Forums Top
So therefore it should be a decision made by the guy and the girl.


Well, for the most part the guy is begging the girl for sex. 95% of the time a guy will not turn down sex offered by a woman....so if you can see my reasoning with that.

I meant that we both think you should wait until you're married.


I don't see what marriage has to do with how special sex would be.....if you waited until you were married, had sex, and then divorced would it not be like a boyfriend and girlfriend having sex? I think sex is special even if you aren't married....think about it, marriage is only when a priest or someone like a priest says, "Go ahead, hump away" and then you get some legal stuff arranged....other than that there's nothing different from not being married. It's just my thoughts....I really don't want to drag religion in to it....but I think there's something in there that says you don't have to get married if you don't want to.....but I'm not 100% sure on that.....

~Zoo
Reply #20 from JoeUser Forums Top
But see there should be no need for divorce. You should love each other enough to spend the rest of your life with each other. And I'm not trying to drag religion into it. It is strictly what I believe. Even if my religion did say go ahead and fuck away, I still wouldn't. I would still save it for marrige. Even if you couldn't get pregnant or w/e, I still wouldn't. I guess that's just the way I want it to be for me.

~carebear~
Reply #21 from JoeUser Forums Top
I think sex is the way men are wired. You'll appreciate their total FOCUS on it when you are married. (I hope!)