Why I will die of starvation....

from Stardock Forums

I just can't cook!!  It's not that I have not tried... it's just the fact that whatever I make turns to goo... or worse!!  When resturants start to shut down in this rough economy here in the US, I will 'literally' die of starvation.

At this time, I am scared to even try a sample taste of anything I make... yes, things turn out that bad.  It saddens me because I tend to follow directions very carefully.  Correct measurements, correct cooking times, etc., etc.... maybe the directions are wrong?  I can't see what I could possibly be doing wrong.

For some odd reason, I have ZERO talent for cooking.  I'm not a great multitasker to begin with, and I'm told this is a must for cooking.  Sometimes, I just wish my food would turn out ok and it was edible.  Try, try and try again to perfect? HAH! I say, HAH!!  Not unless there is a way to perfect goo.

Watch for my next post at a later date which will be titled 'How to kill others with bad cooking'  ;p

off-topic
58,219 views 15 replies
Reply #1 from Demigod Forums Top

Top Ramen.

 

:fox:

Reply #2 from JoeUser Forums Top

Quoting Kitkun, reply 1
Top Ramen.

The cooking inept's best friend. *nods*

CursorFX - Customize your Windows cursor
Reply #3 from GalCiv2 Forums Top

Can I have your stereo? :P

Reply #4 from Demigod Forums Top

I burn all my food to a crisp, but because that is how I like it, tastes better that way.

What are you cooking the turns into goo? I have no problem with making food, and I worked as a restaurant cook at age 14.

If worst comes to worst, put it into the microwave and nuke it!

Reply #5 from Sins Forums Top

I burn all my food to a crisp, but because that is how I like it, tastes better that way.

carcinogens = cancer

kind of funny, even eating burnt food, BBQ, can lead to cancer

 

Reply #6 from Demigod Forums Top

I burn all my food to a crisp
I worked as a restaurant cook at age 14.
Where, exactly, did you work?

 

:fox:

Reply #7 from Demigod Forums Top

Quoting DarthCaedusMorgan, reply 5

carcinogens = cancer

kind of funny, even eating burnt food, BBQ, can lead to cancer

 

 

Ya... I heard of that before but never with the term "carcinogens"... Sounds very deadly...

 

Quoting Kitkun, reply 6

Where, exactly, did you work?

 

East Side Mario's, it was an great experience and I recommend you dine out there sometime! Awesome food.

Oh, and of course (incase your implying it) I didn't burn food where I worked. What I want, and the restaurant's standard are completely different, and I follow the standard.

 

Reply #8 from Elemental Forums Top

And don't forget poptarts! We will always have a ready supply of them.

Reply #10 from Demigod Forums Top

75%of my diet is cereal, It's healthly and awesome.  Once you finish eatting it then you have chocolate milk!

Other foods that require no talent like i have none.

Hotpockets, Easymac, Frozen dinners, fruit, salads (Buy a bag of it then add your dressing.) Food in cans, potato chips

Reply #11 from Demigod Forums Top

Lol... most cereal is pretty unhealthy... espeically the ones that end up with chocolate milk

 

If you don't learn to cook, you don't deserve to eat i.m.o :)

Reply #13 from Sins Forums Top

Would help if you mention the operating stove and which brand scaucepan you're using.   Cookery support usually advise to reheat the stove and place the scaucepan filled with water to check to see if the water is boiling after 4 minutes.  Mostly the problem is  scaucepan on the wrong burner and the customer is adviced to replace the scauceopan on the correct burner.  IF the pan is on the correct burner and the water doesn't boil at 4 minutes, the scaucepan is outdated and in need of an upgrade or not compatible with the older wood burning stoves.

Reply #14 from Demigod Forums Top


I just can't cook!!  It's not that I have not tried... it's just the fact that whatever I make turns to goo... or worse!!  When resturants start to shut down in this rough economy here in the US, I will 'literally' die of starvation.

At this time, I am scared to even try a sample taste of anything I make... yes, things turn out that bad.  It saddens me because I tend to follow directions very carefully.  Correct measurements, correct cooking times, etc., etc.... maybe the directions are wrong?  I can't see what I could possibly be doing wrong.

For some odd reason, I have ZERO talent for cooking.  I'm not a great multitasker to begin with, and I'm told this is a must for cooking.  Sometimes, I just wish my food would turn out ok and it was edible.  Try, try and try again to perfect? HAH! I say, HAH!!  Not unless there is a way to perfect goo.

Watch for my next post at a later date which will be titled 'How to kill others with bad cooking' 

check out the marked sentance.
If you still fail i think there is a problem with your stove ;P

anyways, i figure that if you have the money to spend on restourants
then you can buy full frozen meals instead of ingridiants
sure some of them are not healthy so be carefull

Reply #15 from Demigod Forums Top

Scrambled eggs are quick, easy and pretty damn awesome.  The golden rule is don't cook them for too long - once you figure this out, you can scramble to impress :P

 

I'm not quite sure if the OP is being serious :)