Are we as bad as men think?

from JoeUser Forums

I was watching television, channel surfing for something to watch. I flipped the screen and there were the Fab Five. I stopped because I wanted to see who they were making over next. I actually enjoy watching their show. I haven’t been tuning in as often as I used to so I decided to watch.


They were making over a family of three men. One of them said that the reason why he doesn’t have a girlfriend or wife right now is because he couldn’t deal with the emotions and attitude of women. In short, they weren’t very nice. Why? His reasoning was: “The week before their period they would be crabby and biting his head off, the week after it would be the same thing. When can they (women) be nice? Why can’t a woman be as nice as his mom? If a woman gave unconditional love like a mother then there would be no divorces.”


Are you kidding me? As a woman hearing that from him, made me wonder if we, women, are as bad as all that? OK, so we have our moments when we do go into our moods. Do you (men) really blame us for that? It’s not our fault that our bodies have to prepare itself this way once a month. I guess he forgets that a woman’s body is preparing itself for childbirth and so goes through this process and it’s totally normal!


I bet you if a man had to go through what we did, they would be whimpering and crying like babies! How would he like to be walking around for two weeks before his body goes through its monthly cycle, feeling cramps, pain of unmentionable proportion, (some women have it real bad) and feeling like his body is ready to explode.


His stomach swollen and look like he’s pregnant. Imagine walking or doing normal activity when he’s suddenly gasping for breath from the cramp that suddenly sidelines him and he begins to limp.


Imagine having weird cravings, like being pregnant. Imagine if he had to deal with the flow that comes at him and having to take a bath 3-5 times per day and changing underwear constantly. Imagine dealing with all this and hoping that his flow won’t be heavy or too crampy or that he’ll have to actually curtail his activities for a couple of days. And with all that comes headache and heaven knows what else because some women do experience more and because no two women have the same experience!


As women we have to deal with all this and still walk around and try to be normal and still be a wife, mother, friend, employee or employer and everything that we as women handle in our daily lives.


So if we do get a little bitchy and we do get a little attitude once a month, allow us to be that way. Just stay the frig out of your woman’s way if you can’t deal with it! Or you can be a wonderful guy and bring her lots of chocolate and rub her back, tummy or feet and let her be.


Is that too much to ask?
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12,572 views 33 replies
Reply #1 from JoeUser Forums Top
Ok, dear....calm down. All women are beautiful and lovely all the time. It's okay to have an attitude, I understand your pain.



Who says I don't know how to handle that kind of situation?

~Zoo
Reply #2 from JoeUser Forums Top
Ok, dear....calm down.


I"m calm Zoo, just annoyed at the way some men think.


Who says I don't know how to handle that kind of situation?


You just might, for say a week or two! [totally laughing at you here!]
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Reply #3 from JoeUser Forums Top
You just might, for say a week or two! [totally laughing at you here!]


Haha...well, I know when to tread lightly. On minefields....and a PMS zone.

~Zoo
Reply #4 from JoeUser Forums Top
I get in terrible moods when I'm on my period. I'm actually looking to get something for it, because I literally grow to heads, it isn't pretty!

You go girl, it's about time men realised what us ladies have to go through!

Oh and for the record boys...everytime I'm in a mood DOES NOT mean I am on my period...sometimes you just outright piss me off. OK! Hehe
Reply #5 from JoeUser Forums Top
Personally I love women,






all men should own at least four...

MM ducks and runs.. laughing like a loon.....
Reply #6 from JoeUser Forums Top
I like that part about the guy wanting unconditional love like his mother gave him. Um..... did SHE never have PMS? Give that boy a smack with the tuna to shake him out of his little timewarp into boyhood and not getting all that adult crap floating around but not penetrating his little kid brain.

And another little thing about his whinging about unconditonal love... don't you actually have to GIVE love to get love? Hence, wouldn't HE have to have unconditional love for an adult woman other than his mother (because let's not go Oedipus here) meaning that the PMS thing wouldn't really matter? (annoying sure, but dealable).

I say he just identified himself as a male not man enough to be worth a woman's time. NEXT!!!!!!!!!!!

I don't have PMS, but I hate it when men whine about stuff like that. I have been keenly observing the interactions among my husband's soccer team, and know what? They get moody and pissy, too. Mostly, it's just funny. In fact, I've even seen that moodiness get into fisticuffs! I've yet to see a woman get into a fight because of PMS outside of Jerry Springer (but I think issues other than PMS are at work there).

Why bother using fists if you have more effective weapons in the arsenal?????
Reply #7 from JoeUser Forums Top
I get in terrible moods when I'm on my period. I'm actually looking to get something for it, because I literally grow to heads, it isn't pretty!


I had a hysterectomy for a similar reason. Two weeks of normalness and then BAM literal suicidal Bitch! I just couldn't handle it.

Reply #8 from JoeUser Forums Top
Oh and for the record boys...everytime I'm in a mood DOES NOT mean I am on my period...sometimes you just outright piss me off. OK! Hehe


oh well said Sally!
Reply #9 from JoeUser Forums Top
all men should own at least four...


provocative are't you lol
Reply #10 from JoeUser Forums Top
foreverserenity:
So if we do get a little bitchy and we do get a little attitude once a month, allow us to be that way. Just stay the frig out of your woman’s way if you can’t deal with it! Or you can be a wonderful guy and bring her lots of chocolate and rub her back, tummy or feet and let her be.

Whoa! You are dreaming aren't you? (not being bitchy - I promise)

Men are too thick skinned to be sensitive enough to stay out of the way or be a gentle chum and bring chocs and rub your feet - such a man is a rare thing.

Women are complex creatures far beyond the understanding of men - as that guy shows in his ignorance - wanting a mama as a wife, how many years did his mommy breast feed him for goodness sakes, what a wet drippy limp little dick he must be. The gay communtiy will welcome him with open arms, lots of mommy figures there for him.

ROFL xxx
Reply #11 from JoeUser Forums Top
Imagine if he had to deal


What about the swelling boobs? I'd like to see their jewels swell and hurt with every step...well, not really but just once would be nice. They'd be a lot more sympathetic.
Reply #12 from JoeUser Forums Top
I can be in physical pain and discomfort, and so can women, without taking it out on the ones I love. I’ve had girlfriends that would treat me like crap that time of the month but still manage to be nice to their girlfriends. You’re pissed at men because they don’t have the same thing to deal with every month. It has very little to do with just being in pain.

as that guy shows in his ignorance - wanting a mama as a wife, how many years did his mommy breast feed him for goodness sakes, what a wet drippy limp little dick he must be. The gay communtiy will welcome him with open arms, lots of mommy figures there for him.


Most women don’t know what they want from men. You say you want men to be sensitive and attentive but the minute a man expresses any needs or emotional vulnerability he’s a limp dick momma’s boy.

Women are complex creatures far beyond the understanding of men


Sweating the little shit and micromanaging doesn’t make you complex it makes you petty. Men are hardwired to see the big picture and not waste time and thought on petty BS. Don’t mistake simplicity for unengaged. It’s like how scientist (90% male by the way), are trying to meld relativity and quantum mechanics into one unified equation. Maybe it’s you that doesn’t comprehend men.

Reply #13 from JoeUser Forums Top

First, may I offer you a slice of this Chocolate, Chocolate cake?

Second, get real!  A gay man knows about as much about women as a priest does!

And finally, having lived with them all my life (and not about to change), no, they are not that bad.  I just make sure to have Chocolate on hand for the few times it is that or a mauling!

Reply #14 from JoeUser Forums Top
Haha...well, I know when to tread lightly. On minefields....and a PMS zone.


Exactly my good man...you're learning!!




Oh and for the record boys...everytime I'm in a mood DOES NOT mean I am on my period...sometimes you just outright piss me off. OK!


Here, here Sally, this gets me when men think this way.



Personally I love women,


We love you too Elie!


all men should own at least four...MM ducks and runs.. laughing like a loon.....


Hey Coleen.....hahaha, you better not let her see this!!


like that part about the guy wanting unconditional love like his mother gave him. Um..... did SHE never have PMS? Give that boy a smack with the tuna to shake him out of his little timewarp into boyhood and not getting all that adult crap floating around but not penetrating his little kid brain.


Hahaha, I like that! I couldn't agree with you more momijiki!




Hence, wouldn't HE have to have unconditional love for an adult woman other than his mother (because let's not go Oedipus here) meaning that the PMS thing wouldn't really matter? (annoying sure, but dealable).


Exactly!



I have been keenly observing the interactions among my husband's soccer team, and know what? They get moody and pissy, too. Mostly, it's just funny. In fact, I've even seen that moodiness get into fisticuffs! I've yet to see a woman get into a fight because of PMS outside of Jerry Springer (but I think issues other than PMS are at work there).


haha, you're so funny! I think I saw you wrote that somewhere!



I had a hysterectomy for a similar reason. Two weeks of normalness and then BAM literal suicidal Bitch! I just couldn't handle it.


I'm sorry to hear that. I know some women really have it bad. I know I get really grouchy, really bitchy at that time but not as bad. This is why I got up in arms when I heard this jerk mouthing off. His excuses are just ridiculous!




oh well said Sally!


Agreed!



Whoa! You are dreaming aren't you?


I can Jennifer. There has to be one guy out there who will do that for his woman. Mine only does it if I ask. I want him to just do it without me asking! But I'll make allowances that at least he does it once in a blue moon!!


Women are complex creatures far beyond the understanding of men - as that guy shows in his ignorance - wanting a mama as a wife, how many years did his mommy breast feed him for goodness sakes, what a wet drippy limp little dick he must be. The gay communtiy will welcome him with open arms, lots of mommy figures there for him.


hahaha, I'll join you on the floor Jennifer! Sorry guys, but I can't help it!



What about the swelling boobs? I'd like to see their jewels swell and hurt with every step...well, not really but just once would be nice. They'd be a lot more sympathetic.


Yep, I forgot about that too. Those babies do hurt at that time too!



What kills me is men who have been married for years and years, and every month they ask us the same stupid question..."What the hell is wrong with you?"Do they never learn? I mean c'mon, a man who's been married for 10 years has already been through it at least 120 times, yet every 28 days or so they ask the same question..."What the hell os wrong with you?"


Totally agreeing with you here and now I'm back on the floor!!!!



And to answer your question, "are we was bad as men think?" the answer is no.We're worse, far far worse. We're just damned sneaky about it.


! Sabrina that's totally for another blog! But yeah, we are when it comes to our survival and our kids, etc., etc.....



I’ve had girlfriends that would treat me like crap that time of the month but still manage to be nice to their girlfriends. You’re pissed at men because they don’t have the same thing to deal with every month. It has very little to do with just being in pain.


Stubby, she will be pissed at you for thinking like this!



Most women don’t know what they want from men. You say you want men to be sensitive and attentive but the minute a man expresses any needs or emotional vulnerability he’s a limp dick momma’s boy.


Aw come on Stubby! You're reasoning is not gelling here. Of course we want men to be sensitive and affectionate. And no he's not a limp dick because he's being sensitive, he's a limp dick because he has no sensitivity! Re-read the blog again and then re-read each of the responses again!



It’s like how scientist (90% male by the way)


That in itself is another blog I might decide to take on one day Stubby, but we'll leave that alone for now!


Maybe it’s you that doesn’t comprehend men.


I think your insensitivity is showing Stubby. Seriously! You can't really expect to come on and whine that we women don't know what we want and call us petty and get away with it? Listen Stubby, you need to go back to the drawing table to Relationship 101 and then to How to engage in conversation 101 and then we can talk!
Reply #15 from JoeUser Forums Top
First, may I offer you a slice of this Chocolate, Chocolate cake?


Thanks Doc!



Second, get real! A gay man knows about as much about women as a priest does!


I dunno, I'll have to ask my friends about that!



And finally, having lived with them all my life (and not about to change), no, they are not that bad. I just make sure to have Chocolate on hand for the few times it is that or a mauling!


! You've learned your lesson well!
Reply #16 from JoeUser Forums Top
I really do wish men can step in our place for a bit...and experience periods and the topsy turviness our emotions sometimes have. Then maybe they can understand why we get into moods and aren't always "nice"....it's no picnic. I do have a man who is sensitive to my ummm... monthly needs, but I do know that he still scratches his head as to why I am acting this way and that.


To answer the question, "Are we as bad as men think?", I actually feel most men don't think we are "bad"....they just feel helpless as to how to cope with our mysterious ways.
Reply #17 from JoeUser Forums Top
they just feel helpless as to how to cope with our mysterious ways


Hey...that sounds like a good excuse.

~Zoo
Reply #18 from JoeUser Forums Top
But none of us escapes the hormonal influences, and that's what causes the mood swings...not cramps or bloating or tender breasts.


Thanks for explaining it so well LW. Once I had my ovaries removed all my craziness went with 'em. It's definitely a hormonal thing.

I'm glad your dad's back to normal.
Reply #19 from JoeUser Forums Top
Just because you hormones are messing with you doesn’t mean your behavior is involuntary. As I said I’ve seen women control it with other women. Would you accept PMS as an excuse for you girlfriend treating you badly? The women I know don't.
Reply #20 from JoeUser Forums Top
I really do wish men can step in our place for a bit...and experience periods and the topsy turviness our emotions sometimes have. Then maybe they can understand why we get into moods and aren't always "nice"....it's no picnic


Exactly! Walk a month in a woman's shoe!


I do have a man who is sensitive to my ummm... monthly needs, but I do know that he still scratches his head as to why I am acting this way and that.


Same of mine too.



To answer the question, "Are we as bad as men think?", I actually feel most men don't think we are "bad"....they just feel helpless as to how to cope with our mysterious ways.


Those are the good ones. The ones who will actually try to do something even if they feel helpless, even if they just stay out of our way for a few days, like walking on eggshells!LOL!

Hey...that sounds like a good excuse.


One you could use when the time comes!


but it can be induced in men by giving them female hormones.


aha, let's line up the insitive ones and give them a shot so they can actually know what women go through.

This normally calm, rational, and logical man became a sensitive, weepy basket case during that time, bursting into tears over the smallest things and prone to irrational rages and silent sulks for no apparent reason at all.

Needless to say, after it was all over, he returned to 'normal' but with a brand new appreciation for raggin' women, heheh.


Men in general need to know. I'm glad you're dad was OK after that.


As I said I’ve seen women control it with other women. Would you accept PMS as an excuse for you girlfriend treating you badly?


I don't know why that would be. Perhaps they just put on their 'best face' for someone else, on the outside, so to speak. While for you you're her mate and so you're supposed to 'know' her and be able to deal with what she's going through.

The women I know don't.


That's a shame that you seem to have some not too good experiences.
Reply #21 from JoeUser Forums Top
Stubby said something interesting about women not knowing what they want. Actually, I think that is true for both sexes. Men are just as guilty. Case in point, the example FS used in her article. What most people want is an archetype but then get baffled when that archetype turns out to be a real person with great complexities, complications and contradictions. (how's THAT for alliteration?)

I truly believe that most of us build up our image of a person we love and admire. When that image we have clashes with reality, as of course it must because we don't have full access to another's inner being, we come to a relationship crisis. There are two ways of dealing with the crisis. One, the idealist tries to come to terms with the revelations and reworks the image. Two, the idealist is crushed by the disappointment that one's creation have been smashed and is often angry that the partner "isn't the way he/she is supposed to be!"

Obviously this is a simplification but I think it goes a long way to explaining why a lot of relationships go south.
Reply #22 from JoeUser Forums Top
I truly believe that most of us build up our image of a person we love and admire. When that image we have clashes with reality, as of course it must because we don't have full access to another's inner being, we come to a relationship crisis. There are two ways of dealing with the crisis. One, the idealist tries to come to terms with the revelations and reworks the image. Two, the idealist is crushed by the disappointment that one's creation have been smashed and is often angry that the partner "isn't the way he/she is supposed to be!"


I think this is VERY insightful, momijiki.

In my personal experience, my relationship was fragile and conflicted (although I didn't realize it, idealist that I was) until I finally learned to love my husband as he is, and not as he could be or as I thought he should be.
Reply #23 from JoeUser Forums Top
TEX, thanks.

In my personal experience, my relationship was fragile and conflicted (although I didn't realize it, idealist that I was) until I finally learned to love my husband as he is, and not as he could be or as I thought he should be.



That's a lesson I learned the hard way. Ouch! I didn't learn it with my hsband, though. I learned it through some previous relationships. Even feeling that I learned my lesson and was prepared for the crisis (I think all relationship will have one)hubby still managed to throw me a few curves which I found pretty difficult to incorporate.

I was talking to one of my friends about this and she thought it was the most bizarre concept she'd ever heard of. I was thinking, "how could you NOT have thought this?" She's super smart, but I think she is also a super-realist. It's pretty interesting to talk with her.
Reply #24 from JoeUser Forums Top

Men get annoyed with women and vice versa.  Heck, there's a woman who is blogging about how men should be wiped out.

I tend to get annoyed with women for much the same reason I get annoyed with Democrats (and not surprisingly, most women vote for Democrats):

  1. They excessively (from my standpoint) worry about "feelings".
  2. They complain about things but are not interested in finding a solution. (men want to solve problems, women just want understanding).
  3. They tend to worry too much about "what's fair" rather than what's right IMO.

 

Reply #25 from JoeUser Forums Top
Men are just as guilty. Case in point, the example FS used in her article. What most people want is an archetype but then get baffled when that archetype turns out to be a real person with great complexities, complications and contradictions. (how's THAT for alliteration?)


I love it!


I truly believe that most of us build up our image of a person we love and admire. When that image we have clashes with reality, as of course it must because we don't have full access to another's inner being, we come to a relationship crisis. There are two ways of dealing with the crisis. One, the idealist tries to come to terms with the revelations and reworks the image. Two, the idealist is crushed by the disappointment that one's creation have been smashed and is often angry that the partner "isn't the way he/she is supposed to be!"I think this is VERY insightful, momijiki.


I think it is too. You're getting an insightful from me for such a candid and on point comment momijiki!