Yeah, yeah, I know I said I'd start this on Friday, and I know I said that I'd start with Janine Garofalo....but she's said so much stupid stuff that I'm having a hard time knowing where to start.
Angelina, on the other hand, is a little easier to write about.
Angelina Jolie (or the image she projects, anyway) is someone I find truly repulsive. From the way she looks to the way she acts, I find no redeeming qualities in her whatsoever.
She uses her sexuality like a weapon. Yes, Angelina, we all know that you got it going on. Yes, men think that you're all that an a bag of chips. Yes, you have long legs and big tits, and the average man-on-the-street dreams of what you're like in the sack. Why can't you be content with that? With letting us all wonder/dream about your sexual skills? You don't have to be so 'in your face' with it. Take that fiasco at the Oscars, for example. It really wasn't necessary for BillyBob to say 'We fucked in the limo on the way over here', and it really wasn't necessary for you to be hanging all over him, sucking on his face and neck with those chunks of liver you call lips. We don't really need to know that you like to screw every man you've made a film with, regardless of their marital status, and it really wasn't necessary for you and Brad to make so much noise doing the deed on your recent trip to Africa that the other hotel guests complained. Yes, Angelina, you have better sex than the rest of us. There's no need to rub our noses in it.
Let's talk about kids for a little while now. You're starting to remind me of Mia Farrow with all this collecting (oops, I meant adopting) that you're doing. First a Cambodian kid, then an African one....are you trying to have your own United Nations family? Whilst we're on the UN subject, what exactly is your function there? What does a 'Goodwill Ambassador' do? Given your sexual appetite and attitude, I'm drawing my own conclusions.....but anyway, lets get back to the kids. Can your son walk? because every time I see you and him together, you're carrying him. It makes me wonder if he's physically impared somehow.
You're morality seems to be a little askew too, Angelina. You don't really seem to care about a person's marital status...if they're into you, that's good enough for you, apparently. Like Brad Pitt. You KNEW he was married, but you went ahead and slept with him anyway. How do you think that made his wife feel? How do you think she felt when she saw pictures of you, him and your kid on an African beach, playing happy families? Didn't you think that she'd be a little hurt by that? I read recently that your son has started calling Brad 'Daddy' and that you and your tribe are shacked up in his house. Things are moving pretty quick, huh? I mean, nothing was going on when you were filming together, it all started AFTER Jen and Brad decided to split up.....yeah, right. Do you really think anyone's going to believe that? You don't seem to give a rat's ass about anyone else's feelings - Angelina gets what Angelina wants regardless of the impact on other people.
THAT'S why I don't like you.
