Savage you were right.
"When the keys hit the floor"

We will now build a picture frame.
The thickness of the frame is 1 inch.
The width of the top, bottom and side parts will be 3 inches.
The height of the finished frame will be 30 inches.
The width of the finished frame will be 4 inches.
Mathematically this frame is impossible to build.
The smallest width we can obtain with our parts is 6 inches.
We could still build the frame and cut one inch off each side.
Then we could put a 24 inch tall picture in it,if
we use a router to open a hole in the frame for the picture.

In our next lesson we will travel at a speed of 200,000 miles per second.

We are in a car we see a light wave going in the opposite direction,
We measure our closing speed with the light wave at 186,000 miles per second.
We know we are moving and assume that the light wave is standing still.
This tells us that we are traveling at a speed of 186,000 miles per second.
If we accelerate for a while we will be going 200,000 miles per second.

Due to heat, humidity, barometric pressure and grade changes
the length of the train would fluctuate rendering the experiment
worthless, but it is a nice thought experiment.

The little darlings.
Eighth grade literature class.
The most intelligent kid in the class wore a shirt
that said "Flunk Now Beat The Rush",threw eggs at the chalk board,
set the trash can on fire on a regular basis and never got caught.
The rest of the class chewed on newspaper and threw spit wads at everything.
The teacher wore bubblegum in her hair.
Why don't we just move to the jungle and throw crap at each other?
 

A friend once told me,
"People who talk bad about you behind your back
are just jealous".

There are some very successful people I
hear on the radio who complain for their
whole show every day.
I guess success isn't all that great.

Conway and anger management

You spent the last 12 years building an economy
on loan commissions and sales commissions,
and here we are.

Here is the list of the top three republican candidates for
president assuming we live in a logical world that makes sense.

Newton Leroy Gingrich

Who owns the Zebra?

Words I won't hear anymore: Say them if you like.
"Class warfare"
"Entitlements", it is a contract and everyone has payed the tax
and is paying all the taxes.

Phrase I am changing:
Old: "Documented to be almost always right."
New: "Documented to be almost always full of sh_ _."

They watch cars go around in a circle.

Everyone has the same ability to empathize,
some are much better at faking it then others.