As Parrottmath points out, Tuidjy's "Newbie Guide" thread is excellent. You should definitely take a look at it. One nice thing Tuidjy does, is provide extended explanations for some gameplay aspects, and then (often) finishes with a One Sentence summary, which says something like: "If there is one thing you take away from this ... "
https://forums.elementalgame.com/435680
This is most useful, because you don't really have to understand and memorize everything that Tuidjy has "diagrammed", to get some genuinely useful help from his thread!
But then we are left with the fact, that this game REALLY is very complex, textured, and (at times) kind of unforgiving ... As an example, I just finished my 14th game, which I won; but it was a tortuous, Major Struggle, almost to the very end. My playing time ran over 25 hours (I am slow, I admit); I played on Easy, facing only two AI races; and the game lasted 348 turns! The thing is, I have been a Beta tester since the end of February, have been playing 4X games since the first version of Civilization, and generally I can have fun at pretty advanced levels in most such games. But with Fallen Enchantress, I have played about half the games on Easy, and half on Normal, and I have still managed to lose 2 games out of 14! This game is just plain hard, IMHO.
On the other hand, I really do love this game. You just have to keep plugging away at the Learning Curve! In the meantime, I suggest focusing on the Start-up Screens, to tailor the game to your strengths and preferences. For learning, I suggest playing the easiest level your Ego will permit ( 
); dropping the number of AI opponents by one on smaller maps, and by at least two, on "Large" maps; and selecting opponents who do not have "killer" advantages. I find it easiest to play against Procipinee, Magnar (which is counter-intuitive to me), Markin, and Verga. I suggest keeping monster density at Moderate, because the leveling that your hero's gain from killing all those monsters, is a real advantage. However, as Kalin rightly points out, you have to pick city sites carefully (to avoid awakening the worst monsters), and pick and choose your battles with care (at least, when you have the option). Finally, hang in there -- occasionally you may find a game that is easier than you expect; and ALL of the games will add to your expertise!
