also is there a reason why every ai decides to attack me? they all gang up on me. doesnt seem right.
Yes... it's probably due to diplomacy and the AI bribing the other AI to attack you. You have the same options, but you probably use your money for other things or don't feel it's worth the cost.
Plus it's hard to say what you mean by 13 groups of high level... what is high level to you... level 10, level 5, level 15 and where was your own units? Also, you must realize that the AI when it plays these maps they do not get a buffer away from any monsters, so they deal with a lot more monsters than you see on your side of things. This is where the higher levels come into play. Also, they tend to do quests and role for success. These quests provide lots of xp and can be the reason for the distinction.
I'm not defending the AI, I'm just explaining what are the possible symptoms of the problem you are facing. You can decide whether the AI is cheating or not, but it's not supposed to cheat.