Yarlen, thanks for weighing in on this issue; one of the things that's always impressed me about Sins is the general availability of the devs.
With regard to the issue at hand, it seems that a lot of people expected the Vasari to be extremely powerful individually, balanced by a lack of numbers: specifically, much increased resource and fleet capacity costs. I don't really see that this is incompatible with them being a more finesse-oriented race, in the manner that you've stated. I think that most people would agree (though clearly I can't speak for them) that what they want is a balance where one-on-one a Vasari warship will decisively defeat its approximate TEC counterpart -- but the TEC will always have superior numbers of ships, such that resource-to-resource the Vasari can't quite stand head to head with their enemies. The Vasari are technologically superior, but their population is very limited, and losses should hurt them far more than they hurt the entrenched, numerically-superior TEC.
For example, imagine that the Vasari Devastator could reliably bring down a Kol battleship and a small-to-moderate fleet of escorts in a straight-up fight, and survive to run and repair itself. But that Devastator would cost 60-80 fleet cap (probably 60, since you need to be able to build a flagship at game start) and significantly more resources than the Kol, such that the TEC need never send a single Kol against a Devastator -- unless their Vasari opponent outsmarted them and struck where they were weak. Perhaps training upgrades also become more expensive for the Vasari, so that losing a warship with an experienced crew becomes even more painful. This balance can also come down to the frigate level -- perhaps the Transporter carries two squadrons, but costs twice as much in resources and fleet capacity as it does now, for example. (Note that all numbers are pulled out of thin air, and not indicative of actual balance calculations.

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I think this sort of solution would satisfy both sides of the argument and, as one of the devs has pointed out elsewhere, be relatively easy to implement. LordKosc has more or less already done so in his Vasari mod, in fact. I do have to say that I'm extremely impressed with the way the game has been shaping up so far; it's eating up far too much of my free time (and sleep time) even as a beta.